Disconnect to Reconnect

“It’s a shame they’re filling your head with nonsense…In the end they won’t let you sing, they’ll cover your shoulders and tell you that you’re worse than men. Don’t do this to yourself. The world is filled with wonderful things; you don’t need to invent more.”

“Take it in small doses…be careful.”

“Just don’t become an extremist, okay?”

From the above responses, you’d think I decided to join the Taliban or partake in a Heroin smuggling scheme. I haven’t. Interestingly, the above quotes are reactions from various family and friends to my decision to start keeping Shabbat.

Sadly, I’m not that surprised. Jews – especially those in Israel – have become absurdly polarized. I have met many secular Jews who see the religious as brainwashed and met religious Jews who see the secular as hedonistic and lacking core values. 

There is a blindness on both “sides” that prevents them from engaging the worlds of the “other.”

Here, of course, I’m talking about the extremes on both ends. In Israel, there are sects that float somewhere in middle, but the “conservative” movement (to which I was affiliated in the U.S.) is barely existent.

Indeed, many who visit Israel for the first time are surprised to see the secular nature of mainstream society. While Judaism as a culture is an integral part of Israeli society (i.e. the street signs, national holidays, Friday family dinners, public education), observant people are a minority (about 25%).

Because Jewish culture is ubiquitous in Israel, citizens don’t have to work hard to retain their Jewish identity. Outside of Israel, however, Jews who are steadfast in maintaining a strong Jewish identity send their kids to Jewish schools, join community centers, synagogues, and keep the Sabbath and holidays. In Israel, there’s no blatant need to send one’s kids to “Jewish school”—everyone is already Jewish and Torah classes are mandatory by law in all public schools.

Thus, from the very inception of modern Israel, the topic of religion and state cleaved a wide rift in Israeli society. Should public busses run on Shabbat? Can the state allow inter-marriage? Who can immigrate to Israel? These are questions that divide the people of this country. These are questions that politicize Judaism, which is not political by nature.  These are questions that cause others to twinge when I say I’ve started keeping Shabbat.

But for me, keeping Shabbat has absolutely nothing to do with whom I voted for or what I believe about intermarriage. It has nothing to do with how I view secular people or religious people. For me, keeping Shabbat is disconnecting to reconnect. It’s lighting candles, saying a blessing, and feeling close to my people’s past, present, and future. It’s being a link in a chain, knowing I will pass on this tradition to my children and they will hopefully pass it to theirs. Keeping Shabbat is taking a breath—a much-needed pause from the bustle of the week, and rejoicing in song, food, community, and spirit. It is the necessary rest that recharges me for the week to come.

This decision has been in the works for a while now. I tried keeping Shabbat on-and-off in college, but could never find a groove.  Since arriving in Israel, I always said I would wait until I found community, because keeping Shabbat alone is isolating.

But after a meaningful experience in Tzfat during the holiday of Shavuot, my intuition told me now is the time. There is a reason that during the reading of the 10 commandments, I cried. The melodies, the power in the atmosphere, the unity of my people at that moment moved me beyond words.

There is a reason that I get emotional at the point in the Friday night service when everyone’s voices unite in saying (in Hebrew, of course): “So the sons of Israel shall observe the sabbath, to celebrate the sabbath throughout their generations as a perpetual covenant. It is a sign between Me and the sons of Israel forever; for in six days G-d made heaven and earth, but on the seventh day He ceased from labor, and was refreshed."

Since deciding to keep Shabbat, I’ve felt a sense of alignment that I haven’t felt in a long time.  I’ve met inspirational people and had unexpectedly uplifting experiences, some of which I will explain in posts to come. 

Until then, wishing everyone a peaceful Shabbat (or weekend for all my non-Jewish friends). May we all find this sense of alignment in the way that suits us best.